ChhaviBe it a regular working day or a relaxing weekend, every day is a challenge for us as working moms. We’re continually jumping from one task to another and trying to focus on work while suffering from an ever-lasting ‘mommy guilt.’ Whether our partners, colleagues, or friends understand this or not, I’m sure that we and our moms are nothing short of supermoms or superwomen. Our life is indeed tough, but so are we, and the challenges that we face every day make us even stronger. We can’t push a truck with our bare hands, but we can cook while teaching our children and still be able to get ready for our dinner date.
Here are 9 challenges that all working moms conquer to be who they are: supermoms!
1. We are always rushing. Always.
Whether it’s 4 a.m., 4 p.m., or midnight, we’re always on the dash. And the only time we aren’t rushing is when we’re sleeping.(While we’re still running in dreams.) The rush never ends. Is your child two-years-old? Woman, how will you reach the office on time when your younger one starts crying the moment they find out you’re leaving? That’s their (and our) separation anxiety and there’s nothing to worry about, but at the same time, it is also what makes us run wild all the time.
2. No Time Is Ever Convenient.
I’m honestly always in the middle of a meeting when my phone rings, and I’m notified of my child’s mischief at her grandma's. She is all of 5 years of age but has the potential to make me go nuts. And this is precisely why no time is ever convenient for me. I have to get out of my office when ‘nature’ calls me - whether I’m in the middle of a meeting, or having lunch with a client discussing work, or chit-chatting with an office friend.
3. The Struggle Is Real While Maintaining The Focus.
Well… yeah! Even when we aren’t rushing, our minds always are. Because we are super stressed about everything. We are always anxious. We don’t care about anything yet care about everything related to our child(ren). In the midst of planning things for our children, we absolutely can’t focus on our work. There’s a constant worry that keeps running down our nerves “Is my baby okay?” All we want is to make sure that they’re in the best shape of their health, nothing more and nothing less. This is the stable state of mind we’re running towards. Always!
4. ‘Mommy Guilt’ is really a thing.
I thought there’s no such thing as ‘mommy guilt,’ but the moment I started going to work leaving my 3-year-old behind, I knew it’s real. First things first, I couldn’t stand my baby crying as she saw me leave. I had seen more painful goodbyes, but it’s the worst, and I get to experience it every workday. And this ‘mommy guilt’ is just too big to ever leave me until I get back to my daughter and share a hearty laugh with her and feed her. That time of our reunion is the best; there’s nothing that can beat it. I never think I’m giving her enough time, which is probably true. I even have thoughts of quitting work altogether - of which I’m guilty of not being guilty! (And if you are indeed planning to take a career break, this might help you.)
5. Being A Working Mom Throws Love Life Off The Track.
Be honest here. How many of us think about our partners? It’s an inevitable situation. I often forget thinking about my husband, who himself makes sure that things get done on time. Not only do I have the ‘mommy guilt,’ I also have a pang of persistent 'wife guilt.’ He’s always thinking about me, but I can never think enough about my child. We all know how much free time we can spare - none. So I have to ‘work’ extra at times to take out time for us. It is even more overwhelming for single mothers working hard to get things right and who are probably avoiding the dating scene to take care of their children. Evelyn Watts so wholly shares her challenges through her blog Breadwinningmama.com that I can’t get over them.
6. We Take Sick Leaves For Our Children More Than Ourselves.
Is there a provision at your office that allows you to take an off for your child? No, right? I utilize my sick leaves when my child gets sick, unpaid leaves when I have none left in my kitty. The money will come back, but my child’s health is at the top of my priority. What else am I earning for? Moreover, my two days’ leave extends when I eventually catch my child’s viruses or bacteria. Those days are even more challenging, but to be honest, they give me a break from my even more hectic life.
7. Working Mom Means No Time For Hobbies.
It’s sort of an achievement if you can find time out for your child’s hobbies. The hush-and-rush lives that we live offer almost no time for ourselves. Most of us don’t sleep even for 5 hours and still don’t have enough time. We can’t ever sit and relax. “What’s your favorite hobby?” “Yeah! My son loves reading picture books.” But to be honest, I’ve been thinking of taking up a hobby class such as dancing or yoga - I love them both. And it is only considered healthy to. Working mother lists some hobbies that are considered healthy for working moms.
8. Plans Are Made To Be Shattered.
Either they’re never made, or they’re made to be broken. It’s a match made in heaven. Plans go off track, and we know that they will, but we don’t really care. Although we don’t make back-up plans, running a little late for work isn’t something to worry about anymore - it happens all the time. Canceling dinner dates with our spouses is also not a truly big deal either. I choose not to mention going out with friends; it’s a soft spot - I can cry. Still, to keep things a li’l organized, I use a daily planner. Check this blogpost that walks you through numerous ways of using daily planner apps or making one yourself.
9. We Are Always Anxious About Everything.
It isn’t only about our child. It’s about everything. Would I ever be able to achieve my career goals? Would I ever be able to spend quality time with my lovely man or woman? When am I going to get enough sleep? There’s a lot that’s going on in our life, and consequently, our head. But this isn’t a problem with just the working women: all moms have these thoughts. I know that I would still be here, at this point, even if I weren’t working. I am constantly worried about being looked down upon by my boss and colleagues. I take way more leaves than my fellows; even the number of days I’m working remotely exceeds my allowed limit. But I’m blessed with an understanding boss. It’s a luxury that not everybody enjoys, though. Anxiety has now become a part of my everyday life. Each moment I spend away from my daughter makes me anxious. And when any serious anxiety attack kicks in, I become obnoxious. That’s when I can’t stay away from my not-so-new-born anymore; I’m sure you can’t either. Each goodbye makes me anxious, just as each phone call from her does. I know the pain, so here are some ways you can reduce your parental anxiety.
But We Are Proud Of Being Working Moms.
Our success as working moms overshines our struggles. We are proud of working for whatever reason and still being fully responsible moms. We take pride in whatever we do; we face challenges like a boss. However, it doesn’t mean that at-home moms don’t work. All of us are working moms. Each of us raises a human being that’s humane. We raise our children with the same love and manners. Each of us wishes the same for our children - good health, success, and prosperity. There’s nothing more we would want, but also nothing less. Motherhood is not a phase of life because it doesn’t end. Motherhood itself is life - it only ends with death. So we should celebrate it without thinking much. Also, we must not forget that it isn’t the last relationship we’re left to serve on earth!
Happy Mommy-ing!
